I’m a bit sceptical… Who wrote this article and what were it’s sources? Could it be AI with The Onion as a source? Wouldn’t be the first time a satirical article was used as a source for a real news paper.

Yeah I did the same when I was 16. Had no money and didn’t know better. Just went to the store, bought some JD and drank it with friends in the park. (age limit is now raised to 18 in my country but I was legal to drink at 16).

Well, there’s a town in the US called Berlin. Apparently EDM people go there asking around for the Berghain, super funny haha

Jack Daniels is fucking disgusting. Some people even dare to consider it whiskey, which is a fucking disgrace.

We would be completely fine if Chuck Norris was still alive.

I stand corrected, you are totally right.

Ask the Natives.

And all their slaves (including the current legal slaves who are incarcerated)

The Vietnamese, Kmer, Iraqis, Iranians, Cubans, pffff…

Wait. It’s easier to list the ones that don’t think they are assholes: Israel (bigger assholes), eeeehm… Oh yeah, themselves as they are self-centered AF. End of the list.

The T stands for tyrannosaurus, because of the short arms. Autocorrect says it’s spelled like that, I have no clue as I’m a dyslexicon too.

Happy cake day!

Yeah… Evolve to an inteligent species, then evolve into egocentric low IQ assholes that constantly almost blow up society because of a dick measuring contest… Until they do press the button. First dominate and kill other species, then dominate and kill your own.

Much more realistic game, don’t know if it’s more fun.

But jokes aside, I wouldn’t mind a new version of that game, or something similar. It’s rather unique in its genre.

Careful what you wish for. I don’t want them in my country, even if they bring money. They fuck everything up. I’m not anti immigrants and refugees, they are welcome, they should be treated better, like equals which sadly isn’t always the case in my country. But Americans are a different story. There are some proper Americans, I have a few American friends that are proper, but in general I don’t like to have Americans around.

Even their money can fuck everything up. Like raise property prices so locals can’t buy property anymore. Same with groceries etc.

It’s better to keep them isolated in their own mess. Otherwise they will leave the mess they made to create more mess where you live, then to go somewhere else after that. Irresponsible and selfish people will only bring misery onto others.

In the movie Team America they have a nice saying. “There are pussies, dicks and assholes”. Right now Americans are the assholes. They need to get fucked “otherwise you will have all your pussies and dicks all covered in shit.”

I’ll help. One is the world screwworm (the demented pedo) and the other one has a fancy mustache.

Luckily the US built a border wall so Mexico won’t be overflooded with illegal immigrants trying to profit the free health care.

I’m deeply sorry I didn’t follow your rules for posting comments on the internet. I will indeed find therapy to deal with the shame, and to learn about your rules so I won’t make this mistake ever again. Even my mom called me to tell me I was her biggest disappointment (although in general, not necessarily related to my comment mistake) so you must be right.

Oh sorry, I didn’t know reality checks on timelines weren’t allowed.

By the way, this just got in: a plane just flew into the WTC. We don’t know much yet, but there’s a high possibility it might be a terrorist attack on the US. Stand by for a press conference from your president George W. Bush.

The game got released in 2008, why is this a modern day article as if the game was just released, while the information is what everyone who ever played the game already knows? The game is almost old enough (just 2 more months) to get it’s drivers licence and buy alcohol in my country. When I was reading this I was like: “wait… Was there a new Spore game released?” But no, it’s just about an 18 year old game 🤷

I thought the world was going to shit, but apparently there’s nothing else to write about than an 18 year old game, from a sea of thousands of game being released per year.

Ok, Thanks for sharing, at least it’s not bullshit from Trump or Musk or whatever I guess.

No pandas might be the only positive thing about Kentucky.

The shoe is an Italian shoe so also has nothing to do with Kentucky either.

The guy is from Bosnia so except for animal cruelty in general is has nothing to do with the US.

Salvatore Ganacci will come for you

I also added sharks

With freaking laserbeams

muhuhahahaha

Muhuhuhahahahahahahaha

HAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHA

Please, let him be distracted by stupid shit like that. Instead of declaring wars, kidnapping presidents and committing numerous war crimes and other crimes against humanity.

It’s only forgery if 37 bills are real. Now it’s just a piece of art, which might have a value of 37, maybe more, maybe less.